Spätburgunder

Speckled timberjacks innovate in the leanest and meanest of times, over all the whinging and cringing, crybabies taking turns beating their chests as though abalone were as valuable as diamonds (although, in our faery-less global community, that sentiment should be closer to truth than it currently stands).

Sentiment breaks backs as a matter of fact. You could say that the finer the rampage, the cheaper the glint recommended by the turnstile technician–at least that’s what I’ve come to understand as a giblethead in society’s white pages.

Although, the sorrow contained within a single spätburgunder can hardly be measured with a doughnut and Jeopardy rerun (even a Ken Jennings episode where he wins $75K, sorry to say).

Straight Jacket – 09:43GMT

I decided for once in my life that I would wear a jacket that perfectly aligned to the verticality of my person, straight up and down–no dips or dives, no bacon tendencies.

I called upon my faithful servant to acquire one pre-ironed, pre-steamed, pre-drycleaned, pre-treated, you name it. Nothing but the best for this outstanding gentleman.

Nothing transpired of the whole ordeal. Just another afternoon of grandiose interstellar transpondership in which nobody understood who really runs the show–who among us does?

I really wish I could use my arms.