Nothing says “this stinks” like a loaf of cheese bread wedged between the fridge and the wall for no less than 45 minutes, especially if you’re holding it above a hungry mouse’s mouth while it gnaws on its own foot for sustenance.

Not only will the stench overpower you, but the tiny mammal’s startled yip will get the attention of neighboring creatures, all shapes and sizes. Believe it or not, the average American household contains more distinct species than the average American zoo. Of course, you can’t see 99.7% of them at any given time [unless you have a properly-calibrated microscope lying around].

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