To whom am I addressing this?
Dear Sir Galveston,
please give me money.
No, that’s too formal.
Yo, Mr. G,
gimme some money.
No, that’s too slangy.
Hey, Galveston,
pony up the dough.
No, that’s too mobsterish.
Excuse me, Mr. Galveston?
Can I have some money?
No, that’s too namby pamby.
Is this Mr. Galveston?
Oh great, I’ve heard so much about you!
I’ve come upon troubling times,
and I wonder if you could help me out.
Just a little bit of money
would really go a long way. Please?
I swear it’ll just be this one time,
and you can take my word on it.
No, that’s too panhandler-y.
How do loan officers prefer to be addressed these days?
WHARVED 