Half a heifer to the man who can provide the whereabouts of the golden sombrero.
Okay then, a quarter heifer to the man who can muster the courage to admit his pigheadedness.
Okay then, an eighth of a heifer to the man who can swim to the bottom of this lake and retrieve the gumball machine I carelessly tossed in a bout of sugar rage.
Okay then, a sixteenth of a heifer to the man who can stand on one leg for more than five minutes without breathing.
Okay then, a thirty-second of a heifer to the man who can shave his armpit hair and refuse to scratch the area until it’s fully grown again.
Okay then, a sixty-fourth of a heifer to the man who can tell me where the closest diner might be.
Okay then, I’ll keep the heifer and you all can go to hell.