March On

Umpteen liberty steaks transgress
like no other cut of meat
ever conceived by our dedicated team
of mix-n-match overachievers,
and you can quote me on that.

I don’t find this grand display of sentience
to be entirely unexpected, but I really thought
a few generations of anthropomorphization
would have had to come and go
before such nationalistic forms of protein
started speaking up.

But
I’ve been proven wrong in my assumptions
more times than I can count at this point.
I hold no grudges; I march on
as any man of science would.

Edgar – 17:17GMT

Edgar stood, well enough aware that so many children have no resources to speak of, and playtime doesn’t mean much to them anyway. They have bigger thoughts on their minds, like ending global poverty or shooting the moon. If they’d been born with the opportunity (and indeed the duty) to waste resources, they would squirt ketchup at the problem, hoping that an intelligent solution would just present itself already–haven’t they been patient enough?!

Edgar knows that solutions aren’t a dime a dozen, contrary to the popular belief among his peer group. No good person, in Edgar’s mind, can stomach the ever-placating script that tells them to buy this or subscribe to that. “Isn’t it all just meaningless, anyway? It’s all contributing to the supposed need to consume foreign objects at the cost of individual liberties, here and abroad!”

This Edgar guy is on the right track, I think.
What?! There’s something in my eye! I thought you guys sealed this room off from foreign contaminants! I mean, I just assumed… what kind of rinky-dink operation is this, anyway?