Over the horizon, the Club-Footed Gremlin stood, mouth agape, contemplating the future for his beloved Wiener Hutch (as well as the unprecedented preponderance of bunting; bunting as far as the eye could see). Surely this most recent sequence of events would serve to demonstrate if and why God exists, thought the Club-Footed Gremlin (who really preferred to be referred to as a regular gremlin, but he was never given the satisfaction, as he’d been universally-pigeonholed as that one-dimensional character pretty much from the get-go without any kind of consultation or fanfare).
Business at the Wiener Hutch had truly gone to pot over the past several years, which had proven too much to bear for the community surrounding the celebrated–at one time ubiquitous–hot dog stand responsible for the Kansas City Treat, Tempura Half-Marathon and Coney Island Smackdown, to name just a few of its innovative recipes. What the beleaguered snack joint needed now–more than ever–was a change of scenery, the greener pastures of stripmall suburbia (lunch specials and all). After being praised with an honorable mention for Most Intriguing Recipe Book at the 2017 Rural-to-Urban Restaurant Expo, it was now time to break out of that sleepy old comfort zone and join the big boys in the major leagues.
But in the meantime, what in the hell was all this bunting about? It seemed to have just dropped out of the sky without so much as a howdy-do. The Club-Footed Gremlin grumbled and rubbed his achy knee, perplexed.