Bootlegging lost all its appeal
once they started to make
genuine Rubber Duckies again.
Sure, there’ll continue to be
a market for the knockoffs
and demand won’t be any lower,
but my heart just isn’t in it anymore.
I was a rabid proponent for access
to high-quality imitation ducks
once we learned the connection
between enjoyable baths and longer lifespans.
I made it my life’s mission to provide
nostalgic bathtime to as many individuals
as possible, especially those on a budget.
I never could quite replicate
the color and squeak of the original,
so I knew that once the prohibition ended
I’d feel like a fool if I continued
pushing my makeshift Latex Duckers.

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