If you think bribing an official
with foodstuffs is something
you’d like to attempt,
I’ll have no part in it.

You know that greasing
the wheels of justice
can lead to a runaway
freight train, don’t you?

I brought the mayor
a basket of biscuits
one time, only to see his mouth
snarl up in a frown (he’s
allergic to buttermilk, turns out).