Thought Capital

We thought outside the box when it was still a triangle. We are the progenitors of unconventional thought. Every day, our ad house pumps out unique campaigns and slogans that guarantee our stability as we move forward through the 21st Century. Our mission has always been to scare up free associations and create valuable commodities through words alone. We are America’s last true cottage industry–our creative staff works at home in their boxers and does nothing but generate new combinations of letters in eye-catching tidbits. It only takes one ingenious concoction to make our agency more valuable, and we understand that the road to such lucrative products is paved with half-baked, sometimes ludicrous content. For every JeanKnees and Penergy we create, there are thousands of RhinBows and StareWells left behind. There is no known formula for marketing success–we rely on the public to weed out the bad ones. Our office downtown is set up for nothing but focus groups, 24/7. The building is rigged with more two-way glass than every police precinct in the state combined. Twenty-six floors (we use letters, not numbers), fifty suites in each one. We have more ideas from A to Z per capita than the entire country of Armenia.

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