Wisecracking Gloves

Whose business was it to match wit with brawn at the beginning of time? Who invented that continuum, and why do we stick to it so religiously?

Sure, it’s a spectrum that we all jump around and attempt to mold to our own desires, but there’s that balance eluding us. We stand on one foot in meditation, scrounging around in our minds to find the best descriptors for our situations. It’s possible to find it, but is it favorable? When, after the day, you’ve spent more time musing than doing, it’s difficult to feel fulfilled.

That’s why NuReady is announcing our new line of Wisecracking Gloves; for the comedian in all of us! Slip on a pair of these puppies and you’ll be the suave life of the party. Made of genuine leather, you’ll throw down the gauntlet in any social situation. Simply smash a wall or any other solid surface, and your gloves will be your comic relief.

Goon: “God, I’m so PISSED. This table will catch the brunt of my wrath!”

*POW*

Gloves: “How often do you feel fulfilled from pounding that wood?”

Goon: “All day every day. Hey ladies, I see you noticed my gloves.”

Ladies: “Yeah, they’re so manly.”

All across the nation, Wisecracking Gloves are rapidly becoming a staple at all kinds of gatherings: Bar Mitzvahs, Taffy Pulls, Ribbon Cutting Ceremonies, Little League Baseball Games, Chess Tournaments, Orgies, Parent Teacher Conferences, you name it!

Call now to order your very own pair before supplies run out!

That number is 1 (626) FUNNY GLOVE.

Again, 1 (626) FUNNY GLOVE!

Don’t delay, get your pair today!

Oh Dear

I seem to have burnt my envelope, oh dear.
Now how could that have happened?

I rolled out of bed, put the iron on a curtain,
then oh…

Now the house is gone.
Family too. Went to Pittsburgh.
I have to clean this for myself.

Well, I’ll probably just hire someone;
a contractor with a crew and equipment.

I’ll go to a hotel, eat the chocolate
on my pillow. I hope it’s filled with mint.

Sunday Sermon

Create an image with no prior knowledge and you feel the vibrance of your purest thoughts. What good is research for innate ideas? To compare yours with others? For what purpose? We’re all tuned for our own world filters, and inferring conclusions from differing views only serves to separate and dilute experiences.

If you truly wish to create, you begin with your inner image. You don’t look at your predecessors when you’re about to make something. Do you think that’s how they did it? Perhaps to understand the breadth of the craft and better utilize the medium, but not to create their own unprecedented works.

Trust your intuition and connection with whatever it is that you like to call your inspiration / muse / God. You know what feels right for your method and execution. Pursue it.