And as far as that’s concerned, we need an intervention. Marge, lovely Margerie, you have been a staple of our museum for seven years. It’s time that we fix that issue you’ve been having. We’ve all known it. You’ve been practically crying out for help. And before you say anything, we want you to meet your new therapist from the Orphonoxy Clinic in East Franklin.
The Whole Kit ‘n’ Caboodle
Well, Yeah II
And ya say everything is just so groovy, but ya really have to stop and think. You know, nothin’s worse than havin’ a baby in your eye. And if someone tells ya otherwise, they’re cruisin’ for a bruisin’. But that’s just one priest’s opinion.
Well, Yeah I
Glastonbury, you say? Well, I just hope your mother has the kind of courage to sit upon a hen. What kind of hen, you say? Well, if you don’t know the proper mothersitting etiquette necessary for a hen-squattage, then I’d say you are a part of the problem in the world at large today.
Ounces of Pine 3
But forget all of that stuff you learned just now. What you want to do is decode your existence for the majority of what you are going to call the rest of your life. You won’t remember much of it in the next life, but you might pick up on it after years of intense self-guided study. Decoding takes profound effort and patience, in addition to a rare platinum ring found at only the most exclusive rummage sales.
Ounces of Pine 2
It’s pandering to the half-breathing, half-stalking idiots at bay, the frustrating ones who don’t break their gaze for a lollipop or ice cream cone. Any campaign submits itself to public scrutiny, and that means miserable parasites as well as flourishing patrons receive the same information. How it affects their lives varies tremendously, and be sure never to underestimate the gall that some of these half-wits display on a regular basis.
Ounces of Pine 1
I blinked and lost the square I found. It turned into a rhombus of sorts, then decided to mold into a gypsy woman just past her prime magic-making years. I asked this woman what she meant by the transformation, and she didn’t say a word. Looking around, I noticed an inordinate number of frogs and dragonflies. I asked her if she also noticed these creatures, and she nodded slowly. This interaction taught me that she could indeed understand me and convey her thoughts in a method other than spoken language. I settled into place and began shrugging my shoulders. She also settled and repeatedly bent her left arm at the elbow. We had a lovely time that afternoon.
The Miracle of Moisture
Trefoil tattoos mark the patch of skin where Washington holds the fragments of his battered lip balm container to his heart and sobs like a little girl. He doesn’t remember where or when the cheap possession came to be his, but his cherishing moments are seldom overlooked.
He remembers how windbeaten his lips had been that dry winter day, and how he bundled himself against the elements to at least attempt relieving some of the pain of existing in those conditions.
Suddenly he came upon a convenience store, open 24 hours a day and boasting wonderful room temperature. He dug into his pockets for currency, procuring three dollars and change. He was overjoyed to learn that lip balm only cost a buck seventy-nine. He accepted the two dimes and a penny with his left hand while applying lip-saving moisture with his right.
And now that the balm tin is depleted of product, Washington keeps it in his left breast pocket to remind him of the wonders of the civilized world while providing ceremonial protection against bullets aimed at his heart.
WHARVED 