A smattering of indecisive chatter rings out from the bell tower one fine Winter evening, drowning out the silence normally reserved for a night of much less consequence. For you see, tonight marks the eighth installment of the emperor’s “Don’t Take Anything from My Collection of Gold-Plated Leaves” series. Subjects from across the land have Continue reading LXX


Bungled briefings mar the otherwise immaculate symposium on the births of movements–good and bad–that shape the fabric of humanity, whether we like it or not. The keynote speakers are all on point, but they suffer from the lack of proper introductions, each one needing to compensate for the audience’s initial waning interest. Some choose to Continue reading LXIX


When faced with an eternity of waiting in line at the grand auto parts pavilion, any sane person must conclude that a good book is a valuable commodity in the fight against boredom. Any text will provide images to limit the onslaught of entropy, detailing an almost limitless number of wonders within its pages, marked Continue reading LXVIII


Build up a styrofoam stereotype, the kind that brings opulence to the tiny African schoolchild who just got a new pair of shoes yesterday and chooses to tread lightly for the good of the footwear.


The orange contraband is burning holes in our collective pockets; we’ll need to stop our traveling and find inconspicuous places to drop it all. A hospital, chiropractor’s office, traveling circus or really any other healthcare establishment would cover our asses sufficiently. Once free of the encumbrance, we’ll need to choose where to go next for Continue reading LXVI