“It all stems from my fear of oranges.” “Oranges as in the fruit, or oranges as in the hues?” “Don’t even get me started on Hughs. I have a cousin named Hugh who puts his feet in suitcases six times a day. Try to figure that one out.” “I meant hues as in… never mind. Continue reading Hews


Too many lolligagging pricks sitting around drinking tea and charming snakes from baskets. Everywhere you look, reptiles succumb to the suggestive power of complacent know-it-alls. Am I going to have to be the one to stop it? You’re cowards, all of you. Oh, so some snakes are poisonous? Some lazy fools might have a violent Continue reading Herald


For the most part–as we say around here–no longer does the swan neck riverboat captain hang a hopeful liturgy dispelling the climate of zesty zebra hooves in the sand; an antelope gawks at this critical misstep, but only for a second–it flees from a cackling hyena whose bark is much worse than its bite.

Hay Market

Exuberance flies through the mouth of a hog; that tenderloin needs a few days. Burrow in a barn and send up a flare when the farmer picks up his old pitchfork. The crows don’t seem to mind the cold; they didn’t invest in a timeshare. The kitchen smells like onions and bacon grease.


A gaunt man wearing a fur hat and beat up blue parka twiddles his thumbs on a Sunday morning in Central Park. A casual observer would ask: “Well isn’t there a chess game he could be playing right now? I mean, who twiddles his thumbs these days anyway? Is he counting the number of twiddles? Continue reading Twiddle


The refrigerator holds an endless supply of charming dental whiplash for perusal at a moment’s notice; territorial shotgunning beating corridor hymnals to the moon and back with exceptional speed. Suspend images through honey rollers and feather breakneck sausage patties atop unlaid bricks and mortar. It doesn’t take much when you really think about it.

Snack Love

The versatile, edible almond–taken for granted–roasted, salted, packed into tins. They wait, unbreathing. They see the intricacies of the rigid universe–the spheres and hues and flocking birds–from their sealed vantage point. They take it higher, to philosophy, faith and free will. They struggle to imagine how their brethren must feel out in the air, mobile Continue reading Snack Love

With Me?

I spent my educational life pursuing beauty for the sake of growth and maturation. Now I enter the professional world, which seems to have simplified into the basic pursuit of survival. I have to ground myself and convert the skills I gained from poetic thought and colorful patterns into profitable systems for comfortable living. I Continue reading With Me?